Review: Breast Wishes

Breast Wishes
Seymour Centre
Until 2 May
Tickets $35-$70
Bookings (02) 9351 7940
Critic’s Rating 6/10


Whether you call them boobs, coconuts or "love pillows", breasts attract a lot of attention. Like a mammogram, this new Australian musical gives those glands that give nutrition to newborns and adorn men’s magazines a thorough check up.

Written by Merridy Eastman, Jonathan Gavin, Richard Glover, Wendy Harmer, Sheridan Jobbins, James Millar and Debra Oswald and with lyrics by Bruce Brown, this musical has a clear message – go and get your breasts checked.

Ably performed by Valerie Bader, David Harris, Anne Looby, Chelsea Plumley and the wonderful new talent Gretel Scarlett, Breast Wishes takes us through the stages of having breasts, from bra-fitting to feeding, culminating in a story about a young woman who contracts cancer.

But the important message (a quarter of Australian women with changes in their breasts don't consult a doctor) is lost within a kitchen of far too many cooks. The piece is so didactic and over-written there is little time to feel for the characters.

Certainly there are enough catchy tunes but, put simply, nothing really beats a heart-to-heart with your daughter about looking after those vital and beautiful parts of the female anatomy.